bittErswEet... brAvEry... ???
Posted by catmille13 at 06:28 AM on January 27, 2007.
hahaha... i can't beLieve that im jOtting i mean bLogging this dOwn... since i've said Over & Over & OoOover again tO STOP myself frOm whining in my bLog... & yet... har har... i am stubbOrn fOr a fact...
randOm thOughts...
"bravery is nOt the absence Of fear, but it's On hOw yOU face it..."
yep... been there... dOne THAT! whiLe it is rather... uhmm... quite embarrassing... THAT BRAVE thing that i've dOne (Or maybe it's stupidity fOr Others) was cOnfessing...
"brave peOpLe may nOt Live fOrever, but cOwards dO... yet their Life wOuLd just end up meaningLess... useLess."
confessing tO a guy that i Like him...
"admitting is a cOurageous thing tO dO they say... why? cause when yOu dO that... it means yOu're ready tO face the cOnsequences, whether gOod Or bad."
and being the guLLibLe gurL that i am (yeah yeah... i NEVER Learn)
i EXPECTED sOmethin' in return...
i expected even just a shOrt repLy...
Or even a curt insuLt frOm him...
"sO cOnfused... my heart's bruised... was i ever Loved by yOu?" -Out Of reach by gabrieLLe
but he DID NOT replied anything...
hahaha... that's the price im paying nOw fOr admitting sOmethin' sOoO seriOus & sOoO persOnaL... i THOUGHT i was ready fOr whatever might happen after but aLas... i was wrOng...
cOnfessing which invoLves swaLLowing my pride & ignOring THE sOciaL tabOo (the "maria cLara-i-wiLL-never-tell-a-guy-that-i-Like-him-cOz-peOpLe-might-think-it's-cheap thing) & being ignOred afterwards...
i guess it was a pretty brave thing tO dO...
at Least i knOw NOW On where i stand... Or what i am suppOsed tO be... the "immOrtaL kabarkada" again... fOr the nth time... Ohh hOw irOnic. ;>
"sOmeday, sOmeOne's gOnna Love me... the way i wanted yOu tO need me." -sOmeday by nina
hwehehehe... the bitter posse's fave sOng Of the mOment...
at Least i stiLL have sOme dignity Left... i just simpLy toLd him what i feLt withOut asking anything in return... which is pretty much the decent thing tO dO. 
mOraL Of this experience fOr mOi:
this experience made me reaLize that i am capabLe Of dOing things i NEVER thOught i can & made me feeL that sOmetimes, yOu shOuLd risk sOmething than just waiting fOr sOmething yOu desire...
in my case... he might NOT Like me back but at Least i've discOvered it earLier rather than cOntinuaLLy bLinding myseLf with faLse hOpes & unreaListic expectatiOns... which might be mOre detrimentaL fOr me.
maybe HE wasn't the One...
maybe it wasn't the RIGHT time...
& maybe i wasn't stiLL ready...
but i knOw i'LL Learn these eventuaLLy. =^.^=
Currently listening to: Out Of reach by gabrieLLe
Currently reading: my newest entry, har3x...
Currently watching: nOne?!?
Currently feeling: gloomy